


Hiraeth

by conceptstage



Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [117]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:33:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22295617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptstage/pseuds/conceptstage
Summary: Hiraeth; a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never wasPrompted on Tumblr
Relationships: Jester Lavorre/Beauregard Lionett
Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [117]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1436668
Comments: 2
Kudos: 77





	Hiraeth

**Hiraeth;** _ a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was _

“Thank you,” Marion said, catching Beau by the arm as the others filtered out of her bedchamber. She could hear Jester moving around in her childhood bedroom a few yards away as she turned back to meet her eyes. “For bringing my daughter home.”

“It, uh, it’s no big-” But she paused because she knew that it definitely was a big deal.  _ Her _ mother might not give a damn where she was or whether or not she was still alive, but her understanding as that that was not the norm with mothers. “Happy to,” she said instead, which didn’t feel adequate.

Marion smiled at her though and moved her hand down to hold Beau’s wrist. “Come. Sit with me while Jester gets dressed for dinner.”

Beau cleared her throat and looked at the closed bedroom door, leaving her alone with Jester’s mother. She wasn’t cut out for this, she was gonna fuck something up, she was sure of it. “Sure.” She let herself be pulled over to the pair of reading chairs by the window and resisted the urge to sit comfortably, instead keeping both feet planted firmly on the carpet. “What can I do for you?”

“Oh, I just wanted to talk. Jester keeps me apprised of all your adventures and she has told me so much about you and your friends. She speaks very highly of you in particular, just so that you know.” She gave Beau a knowing look that had Beau coughing awkwardly into her fist and avoiding her insightful gaze. “She’s told me all about your friends’ pasts, all about where they came from and how they came to be here, but…” She paused and licked her lips like she was thinking about how to best to phrase this. “But she has told me very little of your origins. I was wondering if you could tell me a bit about your home.”

“The Mighty Nein is my home,” she answered quickly. “I don’t need any other home.”

That just seemed to make Marion more concerned. “What about your family, darling? I know of Fjord’s circumstances, are you similar?”

“I… No. I have parents, but if you asked them they’d tell you they don’t have a daughter.” She hesitated. She’d really only talked to Nott about this and she was a little tipsy then. This was so much harder. “I was an asshole kid and they got rid of me.”

“Oh, you poor dear,” Marion whispered, reaching over to touch her arm. “How old were you?”

“Sixteen. I had-” She cleared her throat. “I had just turned sixteen. And, uh, the reason that Jester never told you about that is because I never really told her the details. She knows parts of it, she knows the gist.”

“What about your childhood? I imagine from what you’ve just told me that it wasn’t a particularly happy one, but I’d love to hear about it if you don’t mind talking about it.”

Beau sighed and ran her hands over her face. “Is this because of Jester? Because…” She let the sentence hang, unsure what she was about to say. ‘Because I’m not going to do anything about my feelings for your daughter’ maybe? Or ‘Because nothing is gonna happen, Jes will never love me that way’ probably but that just felt depressing to say out loud even though it was true.

“It started out that way,” Marion started when Beau didn’t continue. “I wanted to get to know the woman in love with my only daughter, make sure that you were sincere and kind. But now… I am concerned about you.”

“You don’t need to worry about me, Marion. I’m fine. I’ve always been fine, I will always be fine.”

“Is ‘fine’ enough? Don’t you want happiness?”

Beau frowned and crossed her arms over her chest, trying to make herself look smaller in the chair. “I didn’t… I didn’t know what home was until I became part of this group. Until I met Jes. What more could I ask for?” Marion just gave her a sad look and started rubbing a comforting hand up and down her arm. 

She took this brief break in the conversation to give herself a moment to imagine what it would have been like to have a mother like Marion. A mother who wanted you to be happy even if your plans didn’t line up with theirs. Would she be a better person? A kinder person? Or was this assholishness just who she was, shitty parents or not?

Jester burst out of her bedroom in a bright pink, mid length dress with a petticoat and frills and grinned, throwing her arms out. “Ta da!” she cheered. She looked over at Beau’s strained smile and the concern in her mother’s eyes and frowned, dropping her arms to her side. “The energy in here is super down, did something happen?”

Beau shook her head and stood up, walking over to stand in front of her. “No, nothing happened. You look great.”

Jester grinned and did a spin. “Thanks! I was worried it wasn’t gonna fit anymore because now I’m super buff and strong but it looks cute, right?”

“Very lovely, dear,” Marion said, standing up and walking over as well. “A bit much for dinner, isn’t it?”

“But I never get an occasion to dress up like this!”

Beau chuckled. “I’m sure the others have us a table now. We should go before Nott gets hungry and starts gnawing on the chairs again.”

Jester frowned but started towards the door. “That was only once and it was after we’d gone like a whole day without eating. Don’t tease her about it.”

Beau was still smiling as she moved to follow Jester out with Marion right behind her. “Uh, thanks,” she started. “Thanks for the talk, Marion.”

Marion gave her a soft, kind smile. “You could me ‘Mom’, if you wanted.”

Beau just blinked at her incomprehensibly. “Uhhh… I actually don’t think that I’m physically capable of calling you that, to be totally honest.”

Marion chuckled and followed Beau and her daughter out of the room. “We’ll work up to that one then. I get the feeling we’re going to be in each other’s lives for a very long time.”


End file.
